- 1 Ride to John the bard.
- 2 Defend the bard with your shield
- 3 Defend the bard and defeat the peasants.
- 4 Press E to hire bard John
- 5 Punch the bard or press F5 to change the song
- 6 Ride to the forger.
- 7 Lose the chase by taking off posters.
- 8 Ride to the forger. Like, for real.
Rustler Guy That Knows a Guy Guide Introduction
Guy that knows a guy is the 3rd main quest on Rustler. You are trying to gain fake documents in order to enter the Grand Tournament. Buddy know’s a guy that know’s a guy. Find out how to complete this mission in our Rustler Guy that knows a guy guide!
Rustler Guy That Knows a Guy Dialogue
Buddy: We have to cross that damn bridge, guy. It’s the only way leading to the capitol and the Grand Tournament.
Guy: How do you want to do that? Only nobles have the right to cross it.
Buddy: I know a guy that knows a guy… He’s like a witch, he can fake any kind of document – even a nobility certificate.
Buddy: We could cross the bridge and win the grand tournament with that.
Guy: Gee, I bet nothing would go wrong…
Buddy: Oh, shut up, smartass. Just find John. He’s a bard, he’ll take you to the forger.
Buddy: Also, take a sword. And a shield. I have a feeling that you might need it when John is around.
*Complete Objective – ride to John the bard*
John: *singing* Imagine… There’s no heaven…
Crowd: Boooo! Shut the hell up, you heretic!
*Complete Objective – Defend the bard with your shield*
John: Well, that’s a *hic* tough crowd. You want an autograph?
Guy: I want you to take me to the forger.
Angry Mob Member: That’s him! the bard that screwed my wife!
* Complete objective – Defend the bard and defeat the peasants.*
John: Oh, boy, I’m not having a good day.
Guy: That’s twice I saved your ass.
John: And that’s why I’ll take you to the forger. For a *hic* small fee.
Guy: Fee? You not getting a rock in the face is a fee!
John: Hey, I didn’t ask for help. Besides, a man’s gotta drink. And eat, I guess.
*Complete objective – Press E to hire bard John*
Guy: Ugh, I hate this song.
*Complete Objective – Punch the bard or press F5 to change the song*
John: Sure, I can play you all kinds of shit.
Guy: Now take me to the forger.
*Complete objective – Ride to the forger*
Guard: Look! That’s the bard that stole the lute! Get him!
Guy: Oh, for fuck’s… Is there anyone in this city that doesn’t want you dead?!
John: Look for some wanted posters around the city. There’s always some around. Those idiots will forget about us if we tear them off.
*Complete objective – Lose the chase by taking off posters.*
John: Sorry for the interruption. As I told, this is not the finest of my days.
Guy: I have a feeling you say that every day.
*Complete Objective – Ride to the forger. Like, for real.*
Forger: A-ha! A well informed man seeking my skills! How can I help you?
Guy: I need to fake a nobility certificate.
Forger: I will gladly help you in your enterprise. It will only cost you 5000 coins.
Guy: 5000?! I can’t even count to that number!
Forger: Art is never cheap. But I see you are a resourceful, wise man. You’ll manage
Guy: Where the hell will I get 5000 coins?!
John: Hey, ever heard about the *hic* gossip dealer? He always has some useful tips.
John: Oh, and the priest – word is he’s looking for some well-paid help.
John: Not to mention that the *hic* loan shark might have some interesting gigs.
** Mission End **
Ride to John the bard.
John can be found inside the castle, in the very center. Singing a cover version of John Lennons popular song ‘Imagine’ before it’s even released! Thank god the medieval period was free from copyright laws.
Defend the bard with your shield
Position yourself between John the Bard and the aggressive crowd, shield raised. This will trigger an interaction between the two of you.
Defend the bard and defeat the peasants.
make sure to block enemy attacks as they come in. pulling back away from the enemies and take cheap pot shots at them as you pull back. When the enemies block trigger a heavy attack (hold the LMB down). There is a food spawn just south of the bard. once you have got the attention of the angry peasants. Their attention won’t generally revert back to the bard. So take as long as you need, grabbing the food after it respawns until all the enemies are dead.
Press E to hire bard John
… What are you waiting for? Run up to Bard John and press E to hire him!
Punch the bard or press F5 to change the song
Do one of the two… Choice is yours. However, before doing either of these. Head to one of the locations marked here –
upon doing changing the song. a chase will soon flare up. So you want to stand around at the marker until it does. I usually wait at the bottom left marker. That way I can get the other in one sweep of the city.
Ride to the forger.
Wait for it…
Lose the chase by taking off posters.
Again, as mentioned before. Stand on the bottom left marker, or the top right one before changing the bards song. And then head from their to the bottom right marker after the chase flares up.
Standing here will immediately tear down the first poster. Bottom left marker. I choose to do this on foot. but hug the middle of the road as to not lose the bard. Obviously dodging traffic.
Ride to the forger. Like, for real.
For real, head to the marker… top left.
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Avid sports gamer whos love of the genre dates back to his very first football match, Where he loved competing but hated putting in any actual effort. Thus a compromise was met. Also loves to talk about himself in the third person to make himself seem more important than he is.